I’m not really sure when I realized that I sounded exactly like my mother.
Not that it’s a bad thing.
Just totally unexpected.
I mean….I grew up on “there are nit picks all over your room” and “time for chewing practice” and “if you can’t say something nice….” and “watch your attitude” and my personal favorite….
….”I don’t really care what everyone else is doing.”
And my, myself and my bad attitude would sigh…and promise ourselves that when we grew up we would never talk like that or provide completely unsolicited opinions.
Until the day I got older and wiser and realized….
….how brilliant my mother was all along.
Here’s a story I wrote long ago and far away about things that a brilliant mother says….
….and the beginning of a New York Times Bestseller. 🙂
The other day I walked into the living room….
….and there were little people everywhere.
Little people eating Cheetos and drinking lemonade and playing Bananagrams and watching an intense docudrama where mermaids who live in Australia were trying to decide if they could walk on land and run for student council president at the high school.
There were little people on the couch and on the table and on the chairs.
Little people who had moved all the pillows…
….to the floor.
I stood there quietly for a moment….just staring and wondering why the pillows always ended up on the floor and trying to figure out why mermaids were even running for student council.
And as I stared…..
…..a hush slowly came over the room….well….except for the mermaids and their voting populace.
“Are you okay, Mom?” one of my sons asked in a whisper.
I said nothing.
I simply looked at the pillows and then I glanced pointedly back at him.
“Did you know that pillows on the ground are one of my pet peeves,” I said.
No one said a word.
They looked at the ceiling.
They looked at the floor.
They looked here there and everywhere….except at the floor….
…..and all those pillows.
Then I heard a tiny voice from the peanut gallery say quietly, ” I think Moms have a lot of pet peeves.”
I turned around with great fanfare.
“We do,” I said loudly. “I think I’m going to write a book all about pillows and why people should not eat Cheetos on khaki covered couches without napkins…..and all my pet peeves.”
“And….” I continued with sudden inspiration….
…..”it just might be a New York Times best seller.”
With that brilliant proclamation on pet peeves and pillows I smiled confidently and turned to leave.
And as I walked out the door…..I overheard a whispered aside from one peanut gallery member to another….
….”That is going to be one really big book.”
I’m taking my pillows and moving to Australia and maybe…..
….I can get the newly elected mermaid to put in a good word for me.
PS I’m sure my mother would have had much more to say about the subject. 🙂
PPS I have an fun no-sew pillow tutorial I’m sharing tomorrow. Hope to see you then!