I got a fit bit yesterday.
I know. I get it. I can literally hear you saying to me, “Welcome to 2016.”
The twins wanted to race me and I explained to them to just hand the award to me now because I run circles around them. Today is my first day and I already walked 1200 steps before I had my first cup of coffee.
My challenge isn’t stepping. It’s slowing down and looking and thinking and making wise decisions before I take a step.
Need an illustration?
Oh good.
I was hoping you’d say that.
Once again, here’s a story about turning over a new leaf.
Literally. 🙂
There are days when I’m amazing.
Truly.
Days when the birds chirp and the sun shines and angels are singing the hallelujah chorus on clouds that are dancing across the sky….
…. and mice are making dresses for me to go to the ball
Those are the days when I go all Dr. Seuss and tell myself that I have brains in my head and feet in my shoes and I can steer myself any direction I choose.
Those days are incredible.
And then there are the other 361 days of the year.
Last week I was in a ladies group at church and we were playing a get-to-know you game.
You know….the ones where you’re given a list of things a person might be good at and you have to travel the group with a pen and the list in your hand and ask random people if they have ever been on the tennis team or lived in another country or played a musical instrument.
Scheduled awkward fun.
My favorite.
And there I was in the midst of the group telling everyone that I knew how to play the flute and signing papers right and left….
….when all of a sudden one of the women stopped mid-game and looked at me with a wide-eyed stare.
“You….” she said with a gasp. “It’s you. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
I wish I could tell you that I get that a lot.
But I don’t.
“I’ve been looking everywhere for that signature,” she said as she stared at me.
“Me?” I said with confusion. “You’ve been looking for my signature?”
“Yes,” she said with conviction. (And here’s the part where she paused with super dramatic emphasis). “I’ve been looking everywhere for that signature because it’s on a card in the church library…..
….on a book that’s a year overdue.”
{gulp}
A book that was a year over-due?
Me?
I apologized profusely like someone should who has a book that’s been overdue for a year and told her I would not sleep or eat another piece of broccoli or rest until I had found the missing book.
And I did.
Find it that is.
But as much as I wish it did….
….the story doesn’t end there.
So Sunday morning I ran to the library with the book tucked under my arm. I proudly walked in the door and extended the book to her with great flourish and fanfare.
“Here it is,” I said excitedly. “Here’s the missing book. I’m so sorry it’s so late. It won’t happen again, I promise.”
She looked at the book.
She looked at me.
Then she shook her head and I think I heard an audible sigh. “That’s not the book I was talking about. The one with the card and the signature…that’s another book,” she said. Then she looked a little more closely at the book I was holding and smiled. “But we’re glad you brought this one back. It’s so overdue…
….that we gave up all hope and threw the card away.”
See.
See what I mean?
I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.
And all this book talk? It’s made me want to turn over a new leaf. 🙂
PS My sister made these incredible book sculptures. Here’s the DIY for how to fold a book to look like a state if you want to make a book sculpture of your own.
I always love reading your stories KariAnne!! Hope all is well over your way friend!! xo
Ah ha ha! You made me laugh with this one! I was afraid maybe you had cut it all up lol!
And that is why I try NEVER use our public library. It is far far cheaper to order the books used from amazon and just own them! Also, less embarrassing. My husband is sure someday there will be a new wing built at the library with a plaque with our name on it! Love the post!
Well of course it happened in front of a church group of women! All my "interesting" stories happen with witnesses. Lol. I too thought you had used it for a project. Phew. Just donate to the library fund and all is forgiven. Lol.
Too funny! But I too, thought you used the book for one of your projects! So glad you didn't...but maybe you did! After all...you still have a missing book to find! Happy fit-bitting! ;)
Ohmygosh...literally, the amusement from this story is bubbling up from my core and trying so hard to escape in a silly sounding giggle. I'm so happy I'm not the only one who has these kind of days. Love your stories. Happy day friend! Nancy
Okay.... new rule for me.................................... NEVER... EVER ..... GULP DOWN A NICE HOT SIP OF MORNING COFFEE WHILE READING ABOUT YOUR LATEST AD-VENTURE!!! lolololololololol..... I hope there are no coffee stains on my screen!!!! Geeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzz..... you are right , there is no way you make this stuff up!!!! Oh Karianne.... "Laughter doeth good, like a medicine" !!!!
I really thought you were going to say you returned the book in the form of a DIY'd book wreath...and had been relegated to only the books on tape section of the library. Also, what is this "fit bit" of which you speak? Help me also to step in to 2016. :)
This was hilarious, Karianne! But I'm with the reader above--I thought for sure you had inadvertently turned the book into an origami sculpture. Thank goodness that wasn't the case--lol! Good for you on the fit bit!! Wish I'd done something like that years ago. Hope you have a wonderful day...and perhaps find that other book before the next church meeting--lol.
Wow... okay, while I admit that I thought this was so cute (because you are one of those adorable people that people like me cherish, because I am too harsh for adorable), I was actually wow'ed for a second. Where are the manners of this woman? I was appalled in your defense! Who does that, especially in front of people? I am glad you returned the book, however, a little discretion and a lot of love should be used when in situations like that...
I bought a folded book from your sister! I display it proudly and receive compliments all the time. It will be a keepsake for generations. BTW we should have a fit bit competition! ;)
I'm 100% with Mir.
As a public library director, my favorite story to tell embarrassed-overdue-EXTREMELY-OVERDUE-customers is the one about how, way before I was a librarian, I was just a mom with little kids. And they LOVED books. And I had a whole STACK of overdue books. I finally got up the nerve to go up to the circulation desk and make the following request: "Please, could I just get an estimate?" LOL!!!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha you're too funny!! I thought she was going to say she was looking for you because she absolutely loves your blog!!
Oh, my goodness! I, too, have an embarrassing book story...I cleaned out an upstairs closet and found a Nancy Drew book with my best friend's signature in the front...I had borrowed it from her in middle school and never returned it. We will skip that exactly number of years! Ha! so I texted her a photo with an apology and got it to her when we caught up...but she was so excited that she posted the story on Facebook for ALL to share in the giggles and snickers! Thanks for sharing your moment with me. I knew we were truly heart friends.
I'm new to this but let's see what happens. I laughed & laughed at your post!! I could visualize the ladies at the church because we have them too. You got busy--things go on the back burner--it was a BOOK for heavens sake and that lady made you feel like you'd taken the golden ladder to heaven. Hope all is forgiven--I'm still laughing!!
Love libraries and yes ashamed I too am Often overdo.since moving to my hometown bribing my librarian not to tell My mom... Thanks for the smiles! Enjoy the sun! Shining in KY!☀️
I would love to have a day where mice are making a dress for me to go to the ball! I love that your sister made thistles from a book!! She's so talented, just like her sister!!
Ha--I did a combination of the comments--I thought either A) you chopped the book up into a sculpture or B) she wanted your autograph because of your Thistlewood blog. I don't think I've had a library book for a year, but I did lose one about a year ago, only to find it on a shelf that I had searched several times. How does that happen??? Enjoy your Fitbit.
My church denomination publishes 5-6 "missions" books each year. They are fascinating tales from far away places and I have always enjoyed them, BUT we are encouraged to read them one at a time and pass them around among the church attendees. I have lost so many of them over the years that I now refuse to take them. I'm the one who always messes up the system. And I wish I could tell you how many pieces of sheet music I've found that I borrowed from someone. (Sigh) You are not alone. Now I work at the church and I read in the library on my lunch hour and I never have to remove the books. I think that's the only way it will work for me.
Too stinking funny Karianne! I was seriously afraid that the book sculptures were made from your overdue books. Glad that wasn't the case! ;)
Great story!! I thought you were going to say you had used it for a project!! I saw a plaque today and thought of you - it said, "When life gets dull, put on lipstick!" Thanks for sharing the story....
Pleeeeezzzeee tell us when you find that second book!!!
I love this story! And your sisters beautiful book sculptures! I have had a fitbit for 3 years, last year I walked 1998 miles. This year I am having a slow start. You will love it!
Oh my goodness, KariAnne, this is totally something I would do!!! I did have a book overdue from the church where my boys went to preschool for probably just as long! I can't believe that lady called you out like that! I love that you have such a sense of humor about it - this was so funny to read. We are all just trying to hold it together! Yesterday, I just realized that I didn't answer an invitation for my eight year old to spend the night on Friday - this past weekend's Friday. D'oh!
It's a well known secret among librarians that most have more overdue books than our patrons! Lol thanks for the laugh! Called out in front of church ladies! Oh my.
I so love your storytelling! :)