Tomorrow has always been my favorite day.
It’s the day where I get everything done.
You know. As in….
Tomorrow I’m going to get healthy.
Tomorrow I’m going to exercise.
Tomorrow I’m going to eat right.
Tomorrow beets and broccoli and cauliflower will be my new favorite food.
I think I love it because just between you and me?
It’s only a day away.
For me…..usually my much-anticipated-constantly-promised-over-achieving tomorrow…..
About four months ago. I decided that the day had finally come. I was tired. I didn’t feel good. I was carrying around almost an extra person with me wherever I went. The weight was weighing me down mentally and physically.
And in full embarrassing transparency?
I was worried I wouldn’t fit into the seat at the theater.
I was worried I wouldn’t fit on the ride.
I was worried the seatbelt might not buckle.
I was worried I was going to end up on a reality show where everyone eats broccoli and tries to lose weight.
On the outside, I smiled.
But inside? Where it counts? I was exhausted and tired and overwhelmed.
So I gave myself a pep talk and a lecture all at the same time. This time self…..when I say tomorrow…..I mean it. Absolutely, positively no more procrastinating.
And it worked.
For almost four months….I did it. I ate healthy and made good choices and walked more and sat less and flossed every day and smiled at random people wherever I went to let them know how joyfully happy I was with all the changes I was making in my life.
And I never cheated or ate something I wasn’t supposed to ever.
In the history of ever.
And I lost 50 pounds.
But then? The weight loss slowed down. I plateaued this week and haven’t lost anything. It’s a little discouraging.
And suddenly all that healthy food that tomorrow brought along for the ride…..
…..was totally getting on my last nerve.
And so it was that late last night, I decided I had enough of all these good choices and I decisively (topped off with a little bit of self-righteousness) walked into the butler’s pantry and opened up the cabinet door….
….and there they were.
Rows of Oreos.
Softly and sweetly calling my name.
And at that point, I was so hungry and so frustrated I could have eaten the two entire rows….
….and finished off a pan of brownies for dessert.
I stared at the Oreos and slowly reached into the pantry and took them out and opened the top and stood there silently for a moment as the chocolate and the icing I had missed so much enveloped my senses.
“Really”….I told myself.….“Self….you have been so good with your choices.”
“Self…. it has been four months without an Oreo to tide you over.”
“Self….you deserve it.”
“Oh….and self…..after all…..
….there’s always tomorrow.”
I shook my head. WHAT WAS I THINKING? I had a plan. I had a goal. I was stronger than this. And with the strength of Samson and those powerlifters you see on television, I peeled those Oreos away from my fingers and put them back into the cabinet and left the room.
And drank two glasses of water.
And tried to read a book.
And called my mom.
And brushed my teeth.
And closed my eyes and imagined myself running on the beach in an amazing red bathing suit (cue the Baywatch intro.).
But nothing worked. The siren song of the Oreos was much too strong.
And I marched back into the butler’s pantry and reached for the door…..
At the risk of sounding overly dramatic (and let’s be honest….when has that ever stopped me before) I felt like I had two roads before me. One path was the one I had been down so many times before. We were best of friends….that path and I.
I knew it.
I understood it.
I had traveled that well-worn lane over and over and over again.
The second path was new. It was a little scary and overwhelming and full of steps I’d never taken and making new choices and overcoming bad habits.
But what if I didn’t succeed?
What if the path was too hard?
What if I lost my courage?
……what if tomorrow never came?
I didn’t eat the Oreos.
I shut that cabinet door and shook my head at the fact that I had just stood in the pantry and argued with a snack food.
These past four months have been a journey. Four months of healthy choices and deciding I could do it and exercising and learning that facing a challenge only makes you stronger.
50 pounds down.
5 bracelets on my wrist.
No Oreos in my tummy.
And on this amazing journey, along the way, I have learned that on the road less traveled…..
…tomorrow has never ever ever looked so bright. 🙂
PS With each milestone on the journey, I bought a bracelet to remind myself of where I had been. They are stamped with the words to one of my favorite songs:
“I hope you dance.”
PPS If you ever want to reward yourself with a bracelet, I bought them here (affiliate).
You can custom order your own saying stamped on to them.
And here’s to all the tomorrows we will conquer together. 🙂
Happy day rock star.