This Saturday I took 21,000 steps.

It wasn’t that hard.

For every step I took, I took two steps back.

It was a day that nothing went right.  I got lost on the way to the ballgame and yelled at the general population of the car and sunburned the tip of my nose and discovered that wood bees are not your friends and dropped my phone which now has a giant crack in it held together with scotch tape.

And to add insult to injury?

I cut off the bottom of my jeans to make them fray and misjudged the length and now I’m wearing frayed high waters.

*sigh*

Am I the only one?

Just in case you had a rough weekend, too….

….here’s a little post to make us both smile. 🙂

Container Garden Tips

I know I’ve mentioned this before…..

….but I wake up my house.

Some people might think it’s silly or random or a little odd, and I totally get that.

But it’s kind of my thing.

You see….we are best friends…..my house and I.

In the morning when the sun is peeking its sleepy head around the corner and shining through the vintage panes of the windows and the house is quiet and no one is awake yet to ask where the Captain Crunch is ….

….we have a heart to heart.

And yesterday was no exception. hallway

Yesterday I walked down the hallway and said hello to the pictures.

I straightened the three letter monogram on the wreath and fluffed the pillow.

And told the hallway it looked amazing.

Then I walked through the sunshine into the butler’s pantry and folded a dish towel.

I straightened the dishes and arranged the plates a little.

And I told it that it sparkled.


In the living room I fluffed two pillows, rearranged the chairs and fixed the table.

I picked up a deck of cards left over from last night.

And sighed.

And wondered why cards and monopoly games never seem to pick themselves up.

Then I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a cup of coffee.

And turned on a light.

And started the dishwasher.

And told the kitchen I needed a hair appointment.

Then I turned on the lights in the front room.

And folded the blankets.

And karate chopped the pillows.

And took a plastic ball out of the flower arrangement.

In passing, I mentioned to the front entry that its stripes never looked better.

But it might need a new chair with a monogrammed pillow.

And I told the farm letters that they looked extra rusty.

I saved the dining room for last.

It’s my favorite.

In the morning, the sun comes shining through the windows, making the chandelier sparkle and the burlap curtains glow.

It’s extra fancy.

I straightened the tulips and tucked in a few stray leaves and fixed the chairs and started to open the curtains.

The house was almost ready for the day.

The day was going to be amazing.

And as I quietly, almost reverently, walked behind the chairs….

….suddenly I jumped like someone told me there was a sale in the dollar aisle at Target.

Seriously?

What was that in my sparkling, shining, twinkling, almost-woken-up dining room?

And I looked down at the perfectly patterned floor that coordinated with the beautiful color on the walls next to my linen covered dining room armchairs seated at my newly painted black table….

….to see dog poop between my toes.

Life lessons from a house.

Some days  you are amazing.

And some days you just step in it. 🙂

PS  The story even made the frayed high waters feel better.

Comments

  1. Image for Michelle Michelle

    That's hilarious! I hate it when that happens (dog poop between the toes). Is the cute little culprit incarcerated now? Relegated to the proverbial and real dog house now? Some days are just like that. I've had plenty of my own. Good thing we have the kind of humor that we can laugh at them. After they're over, of course.

  2. Image for Donnamae Donnamae

    Hehe! I have a cat...hairballs. Need I say more? (Your dining room is my favorite too...don't tell the other rooms!) ;)

  3. Image for Debbie Debbie

    Yep my precious perfect Elvis seems to surprise me at times too! I usually find it after I have had a crowd at my house and I'm left wondering if it was there while they were there?. Thanks for keeping it real, so funny and humbling.

  4. Image for Sherry Sherry

    Oh my gosh I am still laughing . I had a similar situation years ago. My husband is a Pastor and we had "guest speaker" and after service we were sitting in our dining room eating dinner when I noticed the "guest speaker" making a funny face and his nose was twitching. I immediately went into a panic because I knew what was going on.....our darling little poodle.. did I say darling? Well our DP had just pooped under the "guest speakers" chair. Dinner and poop great combo to say the least. When I am embarrassed I usually get a case of the simples and start laughing which is exactly what I did. It was a memorable dinner to say the least. Oh and the "guest speaker" became a great friend as a result of our little episode.

  5. Image for Carrie Carrie

    HA! I join everyone else in the comment section for saying "thanks for the laugh"...and if my house was as beautiful as yours, I'd rush through each room to wake them each morning almost as fast as I rush to my coffee maker! Beautiful photos! Beautiful house! Will you share a picture of your Frayed high waters? Shine on, you rock star!

  6. Image for Laura Laura

    This is my favorite post of yours! I think of it nearly every day as I "wake up my house", and I love that phrase. And then sometimes I think about the doggy poo, and I smile and giggle a little! I'm sorry about your pants. Aren't they just cropped jeans now? I'm sure they'll be cute anyway!

  7. Image for Brenda Brenda

    It could have been worse, we once had a snake slithering around our house. We've also had an owl, squirrel, loose birds and lizards. I'm just grateful there are no miniature horses in the house. There was a lady in Knoxville who had a bear in her house, I wonder if the poop was from the bear or her?

  8. Image for Penny Penny

    You are hilarious, but I needed you this morning. I'm grateful for gals like you .... I needed the sunshine and the laughter. God bless you and keep you going strong. We depend on you!!!! ?

  9. Image for Ellen Ellen

    Thank-you for this hilarious post! I can always count on you to brighten any sort of a day. I had a BAD, BAD DAY on Good Friday that caused everything else to stop. The hot water heater broke and flooded the entire basement. Without boring you with the soggy details; just hope you never have this experience ( but pray you are at home at the time if you do)! Life Lessons from the house can be bad!!

  10. Image for Gee Gee

    Hahahaha. I started reading and my heart squeezed at the setbacks you had.... Then I oohed and aawweed at the beautiful photos. Walking along with you. Then I about died. Dog poop!! Sorry, but I laughed. Happy new week Karianne. ?

  11. Image for Debbie Debbie

    Sorry for the bad day and the dog poop. I hate to laugh at your misery, but once again you brought a smile to my face and laughter to my heart. Thanks, sweet friend.

  12. Image for Kris Kris

    Have you ever read any of the Anne of Green Gables books? The main character (Anne) calls days like these "Jonah days". Sorry you had one of those! My weekend was pretty good except for 1) being too lazy to get a chair to reach into a too-tall cupboard and thus impaling my forehead and nose with a plastic pitcher when I tried to get it down and 2) having my "wow, we're on time on Easter morning" sense of accomplishment vanish when the cat vomited ... and vomited ... and vomited. Thank goodness Max Cat seems better today.

  13. Image for L Watts L Watts

    I cannot even imagine being able to write as YOU do. Amazes me . . . I love it as this morning was not the best at our house. Question if I may . . . . . If YOU were painting your wood deck in a SW gray, which color would you use? Would like one that is warm, not too light or dark, and lean more towards a taupe. REPOSE perhaps? Thanks . . . . Your writing makes my morning!

  14. Image for Patty Patty

    I love this post. Did the same thing yesterday but one of our dogs did it in the bathroom - didn't think I needed a light on - WRONG!

  15. Image for Stephanie Ray Brown Stephanie Ray Brown

    Thanks for the reminder that yes "it happens." To me too! I got bronchitis and pneumonia when we moved back to my hometown. So my kids were in charge of " their" dog. Surprise visit by two of Terry's relatives who wanted a tour ( mind you had not been in any room beside our bedroom for weeks.) while kids were in school resulted in my giving these sweet but very clean ladies a tour. As we went to dining room was not ever worried because even though not decorated we had never used... Then it happened. The socked feet of this house lean always ladies stepped in poop not once but twice and stumbled over some hard as brick bats. Oh my I was so embarrassed but yep it " happens" you smile and yes life goes on. Thank you for the reminder!! Heaven helps us with rainy week that is when we see more surprises from Barkley!

  16. Image for Rowena Philbeck Rowena Philbeck

    Oh, yes,,,been their or better yet wake up open the sliding glass door and step out but on top of a gift from my cat…part eaten mouse..UGH!!

  17. Image for Tracy Tracy

    LOL! My dog rolled in the poop outside and came back in as happy as could be to my cookie exchange party. Yep that was fun. If I am not mistaking, you can cut the jeans to capri length and fray it. I know I saw that style someone. Look online and see. IF not start a new fashion trend. Love all you do. Have a great and blessed day.

  18. Image for Anne-Marie Anne-Marie

    I think the dog poop happened to every dog owner .... Like waking up in the middle of the night, not putting on the light because you know the way by heart and walk in it ! .... Yes, I know ! I'm sorry, but seeing is believing .... Just like your pink hair, I'd love a picture of you in your wonderful jeans ..... Have a wonderful day !

  19. Image for Denise Cox Denise Cox

    Karianne.... You are just tooo much... but sooooo right?.. Your family stories are heartwarming and funny. Great to start my day with!! Keep on truckin'..

  20. Image for Leslie Watkins Leslie Watkins

    I love that you wake your gorgeous house up and remind it of it's beauty. I do that, too. I'm especially fond of talking to my yard. It really needs to be reminded when it responds like a rebellious child. As for those wonderful high waters...I envision some great new creative idea to make them amazing. Like new capris...or extra special sewing designs that make them extra special at the bottom. Can't wait to see what you will do with them! and as for that poop...my husband had that happen while taking an order with a photography customer...we still laugh at that story! Happy Monday, friend!! and hopefully a very wonderful week!

  21. Image for Marisa Franca @ All Our Way Marisa Franca @ All Our Way

    Oh, Dear!! I wish I lived near. I'd come over and bring you a surprise -- something that smells much, much better than a doggie gift. Whew!! I can't imagine getting it between my toes -- in the house. I did once step into a cow pie. Yuewwwww!! I threw those shoes away!! Big Hugs!! ? I figured that would smell much better!

  22. Image for Robn Robn

    I am going to have, someday, a house I can walk around and wake up. And I am going to tell it how amazing it looks - even tho it may not be. Because we all need to know we are amazing, even when we are not. Those days happen, and I love the way you tell them. I laugh and I think, what a great friend she would be!! Have a terrific day, btw, you are amazing - even with your frayed pants!!

  23. Image for Cecilia Cecilia

    Oh haha. I know what you mean! My house looks pretty sad in places so thanks for sharing your beautiful spaces. But if you don't mind, I'll just skip the dog poo part, ok?

  24. Image for june june

    Do you know how much money you could make if you could just bottle that gift of telling a story??? Even though you had me yuck at the squishy end...I was loving the room to room tour as if I was with you. You always make me smile?

  25. Image for Sue Sue

    It's like reading a mystery. Here I am thinking something is heart wrenching that one of the kids wrote,instead it's crap. With your stories I can never guess the end. Love it.

  26. Image for Julie Briones Julie Briones

    When you said you had poop between your toes, *I* jumped! You. Are. Amazing! *shakes head... "Where does she *get* this stuff?"*... God just gives it to some, and not to others... even poop between the toes.

  27. Image for Sharon Warren Sharon Warren

    KariAnne I thought I was the only one who had a morning wake up ritual with the house. Still smiling, and occasionally giggling over this post. Gotta love a dog that gives you a present that makes you laugh, and inspires such an honest, hilarious look at what goes on in real life in your beautiful home. Wins the prize for the best home tour ever!

  28. Image for Lanita Anderson Lanita Anderson

    HaHaHaHa! Oh my goodness....I was definitely not expecting that ending! :) I was enjoying the beautiful pictures and hearing about your morning routine..... Thanks for being real - it's always refreshing!

  29. Image for Terri Terri

    oh yes.... Just what I needed this afternoon... Laughing..... Laughing..... Where is the Kleenex??? BECAUSE I AM STILL LAUGHING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The dog poop between the toes ... yes "been there.. done that" !!!!!!!!! Of alllll places... the perfectly perfect Dining Room that sparkles !!! lololololol

  30. Image for Norma Jean Norma Jean

    LOL! ? Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I needed to feel like I'm not alone in trying times. Love what you do and share and how you make me feel connected. You have such a gift. ❤️

  31. Image for Michele @ Thistledown Domestic Creations Michele @ Thistledown Domestic Creations

    I truly just laughed out loud about this! Just what I needed to end my day. Wow, that's the WORST feeling...so I'm not the only person this happens to? The last thing I stepped in is cat barf {{shudder}}. So thankful it hasn't been dog poop for awhile inside the house, usually I step in it outside :) I hope I didn't just jinx myself and will step in it in the morning! I can't standing having to do the hop or walk on your heel thingy to get to where you can wash it off. LOL

  32. Image for Debbie - MountainMama Debbie - MountainMama

    Oh my gosh you and I are like kindred spirits for sure!! I do the same in the mornings, walking around my cozy little house, straightening, fluffing, spritzing with linen spray....picking up millions of dog toys, and always on the lookout for a stray poop or puddle. The life of a dog owner! I love your house, it's so gorgeous, poop and all!!

  33. Image for Amy Venetucci Amy Venetucci

    I haven't read you for a while because, you know, some times life is just a little too crazy busy. And now I realize that's when I most enjoy reading your little gems. Now if you'll please excuse me, I'm going to see if I can find and old pair of jeans to fray at the bottom, even though I have other more important things on my to-do list. ?

  34. Image for Amy Venetucci Amy Venetucci

    I haven't read you for a while because, you know, some times life is just a little too crazy busy. And now I realize that's when I most enjoy reading your little gems. Now if you'll please excuse me, I'm going to see if I can find and old pair of jeans to fray at the bottom, even though I have other more important things on my to-do list. And I may just stop to say hello to my sunny foyer along the way. ?

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